Kara Howland Eng 11February 12, 2002My SisterRelationships between siblings can be very confusing and filled with emotional obstacles. Sharing the same blood type and genetic material does not ensure a lasting and loving relationship. However, with the right amount of sensitivity, and a whole lot of humor, these relationships can grow to be the most important in ones life.
For example, my sister and I had a relationship similar to the landscape of the Rocky Mountains: peaks so high that one would believe us to be best of friends and valleys so low we can actually feel fire and brimstone scorching our toes.
The first time my sister brought her boyfriend home, I showered her bedroom with filthy, smelly clothes, including her undergarments. Imagine her surprise when she opened her door and laid eyes upon her own dirty laundry. I knew shed be mad, what I didnt know was that she would react like a teased bull chasing a red cape. She charged at me like I was a vault in the Olympics, and she was one point away from the gold.
Suddenly out of nowhere came a broom handle to my abdomen. Broom abuse or not, I couldnt stop laughing. Another time, I just wanted to hang around with her and her friends. Being six years old, the eleven-year-olds seemed really cool. That day they were riding dirtbikes in the woods. One would think the bugs and the loud engines would turn me off. No, not me, I wanted a ride. I begged and cried and pleaded until finally some flame-haired boy offered me a ride. What a mistake that was! I have never been so scared in my life. Leaves, dirt, and trees whizzed by me at what seemed to be ninety miles an hour. Thoughts of slamming into trees and pieces of my head joining the leaves littered my mind. Never have I been so happy to touch ground as I was when the ride was over. With tears dripping down my face and my knees shaking so badly I could feel it, I asked my sister to please walk me home. Laughing wickedly, she said, NO and continued with her fun.
After the bike incident, on a cold, anxious Christmas Eve Night, my sister and I singing and dancing around the tree, couldnt calm down. We had been told several times to stop running and jumping around. Too much excitement got to us this time. We ended up playing a game of tug of war with our bright-lighted tree. After a few yanks here and there, down came the tree, crashing down like a twenty-foot wave, sending several little colorful, sharp, glass ornament pieces everywhere, blowing out almost every bulb.
Being sent to our room for what seemed to be forever and of course on what had to be Christmas Eve, we had somewhat of what a moment. We talked about if we could only listen and get along with each other, rather than always disagreeing and arguing. Then we definitely wouldnt have been in this mess at all. We wouldnt have both felt as bad as we did towards our little brothers and our family. Having no Christmas tree (well a very mangled tree) on Christmas Day wouldnt really bring the Holiday spirit to anyone. We apologized to everyone including each other, and made a promise to never fight again. Nine years later, my sister, heaving with sobs, told me that she was pregnant. She said she couldnt dare give up her baby, but at the same time knowing keeping it would change her life forever. I told her that she was stupid and was making a huge mistake, having a baby now would be extremely tough on her as well as on our family. I had never been so disgusted and disappointed in my life. As much as we didnt get along, she was my sister, and I looked up to her. I didnt want to have to see her struggle and ruin her teen years. What a different feeling I experienced the day my perfect nephew was born. All of a sudden this beautiful little baby was in our lives and my sister became a mom. Boy did our relationship change. We started having real conversations about things that mattered such as relationships, my problems, her problems, and just life in general. We shared in the joys of having a baby in the house.
After three weeks, she moved out on her own. As a result of her not being at home constantly gave us less things to fight about. Gradually we started hanging out because we wanted to, not because we were forced together.
Now, I like doing things for her. Where as before, trying to get me to do anything for her was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. However now, when she asks me to baby-sit my nephew, I feel like its my duty and my responsibility. Were really getting closer; we started treating each other like friends and not rival sisters. She had trust in me and that meant everything. Thats all I wanted. To know that my sister likes and wants to hang around with me. Im not just that pest anymore that nobody wanted around.I think its all comes with growing up. If I had the chance to erase all the things Ive done to embarrass her, to disappoint her, and all the nasty things Ive said, I dont think I would. Struggling through our childhood as enemies has made us stronger than ever.
Four years later, were still friends. Very best of friends. Shes always there when I need someone to talk to, never acting as a mother, just as a friend, a listener. She wont jump down my throat when I tell her disappointing news. We talk. Shell try to get through it with me or at least help me as much as she can. Her having a family now, her child, a fiance, and his six-year-old son, you would think would put a damper on our relationship. No, not my sister, she always has time for me, whether its to listen or talk shes there. I couldnt ask for anything better. I do admit we still have our disagreements and petty arguments, but were able to see the bigger picture now: were sisters, and theres no closer bond than that.
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