In marriage realtionships we expected to learn a number of things including the comprimises couple must make with respect to such things as careers, finances, and children. Our initial impressions were that couples must be willing to make these sacrifices in order to have a long and fulfilling relationship with their spouse.
In our discussion on pre-marital sex we both agreed that it was fine as long as it was done responsibly, meaning with the use of contraceptives. We stressed contraceptives because we felt that it was important not only to protect against pregnancy but as well as sexually transmitted diseases. We did however experience one conflict. Laura felt that love and serious committment should play a major role in whether or not a couple should have sex prior to marriage. I on the other hand was a little “looser” on the subject.
I felt that it should mean something but that there was too much emphazes being placed on serious committment. On the subject of contraception anf family planning we had no disagreements. We felt that before having children we must first be able to establish ourselves financially. So once our respective careers were settled upon we could then plan when we would have children. However, until we did decide to have children we agreed that contraception would be used.
The discussion we had on which topics which couples should agree upon was filled with lots of disagreements. We agreed that couples should agree on topics such as issues concerning the children, and major career decisions. We began to disagree on the issues of finances and the distribution of housework. I felt that I should handle all the money as well as do my share of the housework. Laura however, felt that she should be in charge of the money and that I should do all the housework.
In the end we weren’t able to settle on anything but we realized that it was important for married couple to agree on these topics because they are major decisions that affect both equally. The time we spent together was on our lunches and we discussed different aspects for marriage. We realized that couples who were willing to comprimize on important issues were the couple that would be sucessful. The ones that didn’t discuss the various problems which concerned them could never have lasting relationships. This is why we felt that marriage preparation courses are so important.
People should not get involved in something as important a marriage without knowing what to expect of their partner and of what is expected of them.