It is often said that money can’t buy love, but according to Marcus Tullius Cicero’s On Friendship recalling a conversation between Gaius Laelius and his in laws, it is argued that friendship can bring forth the love humans desire. As a lifelong student of philosophy, Cicero had great influence on Western thought regarding friendship as he was profoundly familiar with the works of Plato and Aristotle, actively involved in public life, and was aware of the political crisis experienced in Rome throughout the Hellenistic period inevitably dividing poorly developed friendships. Though Cicero’s On Friendship took place in the dramatic setting of the first triumvirate in Rome, experiencing a war for supremacy, and political backlash imposed on him resulting in a banishment, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the letters written to his close friend Atticus throughout Cicero’s exile held heartening diction in support of his close friendships as outlined in his dialogue.
Cicero’s contribution to Western philosophy stands out above all since he was both a theorist and a practitioner of friendship. Prior to Cicero’s birth, Greek writers were known to have treated the concept of friendship in tasteless, analytical manners from the standpoint of the philosopher only. Cicero’ On Friendship, however, was written by Cicero the man, the friend, addressing his beloved friend Titus Pomponius Atticus describing dialogue between Laelius and his two sons-in-laws on ideal friendships as a form of affection. A form of affection later defined in the dialogue through Laelius, who was close friends with the deceased Scipio, as the “complete accord on all subject’s human and divine, joined with mutual good will and affection”. Cicero’s philosophy of friendship, which he attained from Laelius’ dialogue, and what most of us in modern society hold as friendship values have plenty in common; ideal friendships are voluntary, require effort to be reciprocated between individuals characterized through affection, and most importantly require trust.
The in-depth thought experiments and friendship analysis provided throughout the discourse, is a rather long lasting one for those experiencing grief over lost loved ones, calling the audience to rethink their own definition of friendship and death. When asked why Laelius was absent from his beloved Scipio’s memorial, he recalls Scipio’s final moments alive as being in accomplished state and only knew so due to their love and affection they experienced sharing equal virtue throughout their time together. Given that Scipio believed that “the souls of men are divine, and that when they have quitted the body a return to heaven is open to them, least difficult to those who have been most virtuous and just”, it was well known Scipio strived to achieve this, and not knowingly, accomplished said requirements for admittance into heaven confirmed by his close friend Laelius. Therefore, Laelius concludes that mourning the death of his close friend would be an act of envy rather than friendship.
Ultimately, Cicero’s On Friendship is one of Cicero’s most masterfully written letters outlining the ideal friendships giving meaning to one’s lives, while practicing what he preaches in sharing these ideals with his close friend Atticus. One see’s Cicero’s affection and commitment to strive and maintain beneficial friendships as he understands they are hard to come by. Having gone through a recent loss of a loved one myself, this piece was especially therapeutic, as it may be for most in similar situations, providing said individuals with closure regarding the deceased virtues’ and wishes to be remembered as they were alive which can only be confirmed through the understanding of their friendship. Given this piece was written by Cicero, the man, rather than the philosopher, it is because of this that Cicero’s principles can be applied universally in the practical, everyday life of man to date as it was for the Romans over two thousand years ago.
