Positive and Negative attitude of a Child and The Reasons why they are Strong Home is where there is a father, mother and a child. Home is also a place that is full of love and happiness. But what if this home experienced a conflict between the father and the mother and eventually they got divorce? Could it still be a place that is full of love and happiness? Could you still call it a home? The product of broken homes will never say yes in those questions because divorce has some negative effects to a child.
Many of our classmates or even our friends seek for love, love that they cannot feel at their homes. This is why they feel insecure to their friends that have a complete family. Being insecure, may lead them to hate everything that surrounds them. They may have a hard time at school because their problems in family affect their academics and they become lazy. They also lack confidence in facing the challenges because the persons, their parents, who make them strong, are getting divorce. Children that really grow up with a complete family are stronger both physical and emotional.
Children that experience the conflict between the father and mother became stress and think that they are the reason behind the fight. This leads to the next psychological effect that divorce has on children. Depression is a major effect that divorce has on children. This is not necessarily something that occurs during the divorce, but has major effects on the later life of the child. Some parents are happy and strong enough to face the changes of their lives but if a child would be asked, divorce is so hard for them.
Most often the children responded to the announcement of the divorce with apprehensiveness or anger. Several children panicked and a great many of the younger children didn’t really believe what they had been told. Divorce has many negative effects on the psychological and social aspects of a child’s life. A child may not show initially how he or she feels about the divorce, but the true feelings of that child eventually surface. Children incorporate repertoires of angry, impulsive, and violent behavior into their own behavior as a result of observing their parents’ responses to frustration and rage.
This is something that many children witness, the divorce of their parents going through. The child naturally looks to his or her parent or parents for the example of how to handle certain situations and emotions. During a divorce there is much anger and aggression that is expressed by one or both parents of that child. This is not healthy for the child to witness for several reasons. One of the main reasons is that the child sees this example of aggression that his or her parents are setting, and he or she begins to react in the same manner.
Anger and aggression tend to become the child’s tools for solving his or her problems. The child becomes like the parents and could cause harm to others because of not knowing or understanding how to control these feelings. He or she may often violently lash out at those around him or her that cause these feelings to occur. Depression is a major effect that divorce has on children. This is not necessarily something that occurs during the divorce, but has major effects on the later life of the child.
A high level of marital conflict experienced during childhood has been linked to more depression and other psychological disorders in young adults, compared with those reporting lower levels of family conflict during childhood. Most of the adolescents were overly depressed, many had conscious suicidal thoughts and a minority showed increased acting out with self-destructive components, but without anxious depression. These are common psychological effects of divorce on children. There are also many social effects that divorce has on children.
The child often feels unconnected to his or her peers. He or she feels “unable to make or maintain friendships and complained about being ‘unconnected’ to [his or her] peers”. Also contributing to feeling unconnected to their peers is that divorced children are more aggressive and impulsive and engage in more antisocial behaviors. The divorce that these children experience causes them to act and react in ways that are not considered socially acceptable, and distancing themselves from their peers. The adolescents varied greatly, but did share a number of clinical features.
The great majorities had either lost a previous enjoyment or learning or were, increasingly, cutting and failing classes. The children of these divorced families have become so mixed up that they do not know who they are any longer. Things that they once loved or enjoyed things that they were once interested in no longer matter to them. Going along with socially unacceptable behaviors, divorced children are more likely to use alcohol, cigarettes, and marijuana than are never-divorced children. They are twice as likely to give birth to a child as a teenager compared with never-divorced children.
The children that have suffered through the divorce of their parents tend to rebel against society and the law. This is shown through the higher drug, alcohol, and pregnancy rates of children who come from “broken” homes. The reliability of the child’s word comes into question due to the child’s rebellious ways. He or she might sneak thing behind his or her parents’ backs in order to commit the acts that they are choosing to commit. To conclude, divorce has many negative effects on the children that live through them. “Broken” homes are a tough situation to deal with, that children attempt to handle in very similar ways.
Their reactions to the divorce itself are similar in many ways; it affects both the psychological and social aspects of their lives. The effects of marital breakdown on national prosperity and the well-being of individual children are like the action of termites on the beams in a home’s foundation: They are weakening, quietly but seriously, the structural underpinnings of society. Different Emotions of the Child after the Break-up. Depression and anxiety Children of divorce are significantly more often victims of depression or anxiety well into their twenties.
Anxiety can even result in Anxiety Disorder, another possible Child Psychology Divorce outcome. (A study reported by the American Sociological Review 1998) A dead father is better Children from broken homes have more psychological problems than children from homes disrupted by the death of their father. (Emery 1988). It is because of their thinking that his/her father left them not because the father doesn’t love them or he has another family but the fact that all people are going to die someday and that is the time of his father to depart here on earth. Health problems Children of divorce are found to have more injuries, speech defects, asthma and headaches. When living with their divorced mother, they tend to have more professional help with behavioral and emotional problems (Dawson) because children in this stage are not molded by both of their parents because this stage of their life is the most crucial, the attitudes, talents, etc. are molded here so that they may be a better person someday and to achieve their dreams but how would they do it if their parents are not here to guide and nurture them?
This is like having two of your parents work abroad to sustain all your daily needs. Poor relationships with their divorced parents Children of broken families in the age of 18-22 are twice as likely to have poor a relationship with their parents. They display high levels of emotional distress or problem behavior. Many of them get psychological help. Zill found the effects of divorce still evident 12 to 22 years after the breakup. The impact can be found after 12 to 22 after the divorce. Zill, Morisson & Coiro 1995) This is because of their thinking that their parents do not love them anymore and they are somehow ‘shy’ to communicate with them by, for example, they cannot open-up to their parents (mother/father) because there is something they wanted to clarify or to understand, they find hard to tell what happened all day at school, many teens/children tell stories to their parents when they are dining because that’s the only way that they can eat together as a family, and teens nowadays needs to have a proper guide because of their crooked-way of living. . Behavioral problems: more and worse There are significantly more behavioral problems with children in unhappy families. The behavioral problems in this group are worse too. (Webster-Stratton, 1989) This is the reason why there is bullying, they believe that they need to hurt someone/somebody just to make the feeling of being left go away. Bullying results suicide, violence and positive development-some have argued that bullying can teach life lessons and instill strength.
Helene Guldberg, a child development academic, sparked controversy when she argued that being a victim of bullying can teach a child “how to manage disputes and boost their ability to interact with others”, and that teacher should not intervene, but leave children to respond to the bullying themselves. Aggression A number of researches on Child Psychology Divorce found out children of divorce are more aggressive than children of married couples (Emery 1988) they think of revenge or becoming a rebel. Lonely and unhappy Judith Wallerstein found many children of divorced parents behave impulsive and irritable.
They are more socially withdrawn and as a result, they feel more lonely, insecure, anxious and anxious. Not only right after the divorce, but also 6 years later (Wallerstein 1991) it is because they feel that they needed attention because their parents didn’t have much attention to them. Child Discipline Child discipline is lower in families with parents with marital problems but is lowest with children that live with their unmarried mother (Webster-Stratton, 1989), of course child discipline is very hard in this kind of family, why?
Because the parents didn’t much attention to the growth of their child, they didn’t ‘mold’ the child as others did to their children. 10. Disobedience Research on Child Psychology Divorce found that children of divorce are less obedient to their divorced parents (Stein, Newcomb, and Bentler, 1987) it is also explained in child discipline. Suicide There is a higher suicide rate for children of divorce than for children of normal families. There is no correlation found between the death of a parent and suicide of a child. The suicide seems to be triggered by being rejected by a parent (Larson 1990).
Learning disabilities Analysis of nine years of child psychology divorce data in Australia, unveiled that unmarried women, widows and divorced or separated women are more likely to have children with a moderate intellectual disability than those who were married. The researchers think it has to do with their social disadvantage. (A study by the University of Western Australia) Academic achievement Tends to be lower among children of divorce (Winslow 2004) because their thinking is that they need to get their family back together and they are always remembering how did the conflict started, there is a trauma. The Sleeper Effect The so called “sleeper effect” kicks in on children of divorce on a later age. Most young boys tend to express their emotions and frustrations freely. Their emotions fade out. Young girls however, keep their emotions internally more often. They do not deal with them.
Their emotions stay within and they surface when they mature. Usually, this occurs in a period in which they make essential decisions for their lives for many years to come. They are unconsciously influenced by the anxiety and fear resulting from the divorce of their parents long ago. Wallerstein and Blakeslee). Feeling unsafe In general, children of divorce feel emotionally unsafe as a child. 6 children out of 10 for children of broken families feel unsafe and only 2 out of 10 for married families. (Marquardt 2005) Feeling lonely Children of divorced families reported they are 6 times more likely to feel alone as a child. (Marquardt 2005) They feel that way because they think that his/her family left him/her. They think that their parents left them because they are only thinking of themselves and they don’t care about the family.
