IQ imporatant than EQ

For many years, there has been a strong focus on a specific type of intelligence known as IQ (Intelligence Quotient). IQ encompasses various areas such as Mathematics, spatial learning, verbal skills, logical reasoning, and memory. This type of intelligence has been able to predict performance and to some extent personal and professional success. However, there are individuals with exceptional IQ scores who are not thriving in their lives. They seem to be wasting their potential due to their thinking patterns, behavior, and communication styles that hinder their chances of success. There is an element missing in the equation for success. This missing part is EQ or EIQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient).

According to Aristotle, a Greek philosopher, effectively managing relationships involves being able to express anger towards the appropriate individual, to an appropriate extent, at the appropriate moment, for the appropriate reason, and in the appropriate manner. This idea is referred to as “Emotional Intelligence” by psychologist Daniel Goleman. Goleman’s influential book “Emotional Intelligence” from 199 made this concept widely known.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is a combination of different abilities, such as empathy, self-control, self-awareness, sensitivity to others’ emotions, perseverance, and self-motivation. Individuals who achieve success in life typically exhibit higher levels of emotional intelligence.

Today, it is widely acknowledged that EQ has greater importance than IQ. People with a high EQ demonstrate courageously expressed emotions supported by reason, logic, and reality while avoiding negative feelings like fear, worry, or guilt. It is essential to exhibit bravery and pursue genuine desires rather than feeling obligated or forced into actions. Additionally, effectively communicating our emotions through brief three-word sentences allows them to guide us in life. Independence, self-reliance, and moral autonomy are also indications of a high EQ. Importantly, a high EQ is not motivated by power, wealth, status, fame or seeking approval; instead it thrives on comfort in discussing emotions and freedom from paralyzing fear or worry while recognizing and acknowledging multiple simultaneous feelings.

There is ample evidence indicating that EQ holds more significance than IQ. EQ demonstrates that emotions can impact a person’s behavior, irrespective of their intelligence and high IQ. This is evident in the case of two students who both receive a B- grade on their exam. The student with high EQ shows contentment and accepts the result with reasons, while the other student, despite being brilliant and having a high IQ, reacts aggressively and expresses dissatisfaction with the grade. If the latter individual fails to regulate their emotions, undesirable behavior may manifest.

Another evidence of the impact of emotional intelligence (EQ) in our social lives is that optimistic individuals are always well-received by others. This demonstrates that EQ aids us in understanding the emotions of others, enabling us to act in a friendly and optimistic manner. Moreover, EQ also addresses our own emotional needs by teaching us how to effectively release long-held negative emotions, consequently reducing stress levels in our lives.

Having a high EQ enables us to safeguard ourselves on a biological level. When confronted with a snake attack, our instinctual fear response is triggered. Emotions, such as fear, prompt us to react appropriately to the situation. We instinctively run away and become more cautious when encountering snakes in the future. Furthermore, EQ aids in our self-protection against potential dangers. Anxiety serves as a preventive measure against repeating past errors, while anger serves as a defense mechanism against recurrent disruptions or attacks from others.

Overall, it is understood that EQ is more important than IQ in our lives. Therefore, it is crucial for us to understand how to incorporate EQ into our everyday activities.

• EQ influences a person’s behavior though he is brilliant and high IQ.
• EQ helps us in our social life when we can understand others feelings and act friendly and be more optimistic.
• EQ fulfills our own feelings needs.
• EQ protects us biologically.
• EQ helps us to protect ourselves from dangerous.

The idea of “Intelligence” encompasses various types of cognition, while “Emotional Intelligence” includes different behaviors, patterns, and thoughts. The acquisition of EQ is represented by a model consisting of stages like ‘Know yourself’, ‘Choose yourself’, and ‘Give yourself’. This model was originally introduced by Six Seconds’ Web (www.6seconds.org, 1998).

Stage 1: Know Yourself

• What makes you think , act and feel the way you do?
• What parts of your reaction are habitual (done without conscious thought and which parts are intentional?
• What are you afraid of?

1. Self-awareness : the recognition of the causes and effects of your own feelings and reaction.
2. Self-honesty : the acceptance of your own qualities and faults, your own experiences and emotions and your own power.
3. Independence : the recognition of your own rights and responsibilities as a free person.

Stage 2: Choose Yourself

• How do you know what is right for you?
• Can you increase your awareness of your actions so that you see their effects?
• If you were not afraid, what would you do?
• Can you live with doing less that what is right?

1. Delay gratification : take “right” action even though there may not be immediate reward.
2. Prioritize : bring to the forefront of your mind a “checklist” of what is most important so you can weigh decisions and actions.üManage feelings : use simple techniques, like a pause for reflection, to act – not react.
3. Optimism : recognize that you have choice, that you can make a difference, that you are an important part of a living whole.
4. Accountability : hold yourself to high standards and do what is right.

Stage 3: Give Yourself

• Am I leaving a legacy of good?
• Am I healing or hurting?
• Do I live the golden rule?
• Will I die knowing I lived well?

1. Interdependence : the recognition of an individual’s place in the larger community; awareness and decision making that takes into account the short & long term consequences of our actions.
2. Empathy : use your awareness to guide your choices.
3. Noble Goals : commit to action that serves ideals & serves others, but does not hurt anyone and does not profit one over another.

There are various activities available to enhance emotional intelligence (EQ) and empower individuals to have control over their thoughts, emotions, and actions. These activities primarily revolve around self-awareness, self-reflection regarding EQ, and identifying and acknowledging one’s emotions. These activities have been extracted from the Six Seconds’ Web (1998).

Getting To Know Me

1. Self Index¨Make a list of your strengths and your vulnerabilities.¨Copy your list and give it to several people who know you well and ask them mark the three strengths and the three vulnerabilities that best describe you. Invite them to add others to the list.¨After one week or two, revisit your list and revise it. Choose one strength you will focus on building. Make a list of ways you prevent yourself from fully utilizing that strength.
2. Reflecting on EQ¨Take the emotional intelligence test from books or from websites.¨Check the answer. Do you agree with your results?
3. Naming Feelings¨Clip out 6 cartoons or comics from a paper or magazine. On a separate sheet label each with an emotional concept or a feeling.¨Examples of Concepts : esteem, integrity, hope, community, values, perseverance, gratitude, grace.¨Examples of Feelings : fear, love, anger, pessimism, adoration, despair, anguish, confusion, frustration, anxiety, disgust, terror, ecstasy. ( Six Seconds’ Web, www.6seconds.org , 1998 )

According to the EQ Institute (www.eqi.org, 1999), there are ten habits that define people with high emotional intelligence (EQ).

1. Label their feelings, rather than labeling people or situations.
2. Distinguish between thoughts and feelings.
3. Take responsibility for their feelings.
4. Use their feelings to help them make decisions.
5. Show respect for other people’s feelings.
6. Feel energized, not angry.
7. Validate other people’s feelings.
8. Practice getting a positive value from their negative emotions.
9. Don’t advise, command, control, criticize, judge or lecture to others.
10. Avoid people who invalidate them, or don’t respect their feelings.

Learning about emotional intelligence (EQ) is not a challenging endeavor. Therefore, it is important to regulate our emotions and exhibit appropriate behavior. By referring to the aforementioned list of habits exhibited by individuals with high EQ, we can assess our own emotional intelligence level.

References

1. Know, Choose, Give : Six Seconds Model of Applied Emotional Intelligence. Six Seconds’ Web. Available : http://www.6seconds.org/ [1998, December 10]
2. Review of the book of Daniel Goleman : Emotional Intelligence. EQ Institute  Available : http://www.eqi.org (1999)