- What factors caused Ben and Katie to form their relationship at the beginning? Ben and Katie worked with one another and they became really close because they worked side by side. They were little kids that had crushes on each other in school, with their love taps, and throwing paper balls and things like that with one another.
- How did those factors changed over time? Ben and Katie became undrawn to one another. They both started top like other things and no longer shared the same interest. They no longer had time for each other now that they had kids who were growing up and because they now worked at different places.
- Which dialectics do you see in Ben and Katie’s relationship? The dialects that I see in their relationship are Integration vs. Separation
and Stability vs. Change. Neither one wanted to sacrifice the love of their children to tell them the truth but they were both also ready for change. - What dimensions of intimacy are apparent in Ben and Katie’s relationship? Ben and Katie both share emotional, physical, and shared intimacy. The emotional side is the fact that they love one another but they argue all the time and cant seem to fix their issues of infidelity. The physical side is at one time they did love each other because kids were born. The shared activities are the fact they have children and they still do things as a family.
- How does the dialectic of intimacy and distance affect Ben and Katie’s relationship? Ben and Katie’s main problem is that they have outsiders telling them what they need to do. That’s a problem they are listening to it, when they should be the ones deciding what they need to do as a couple.
- How is the game of high/low related to intimacy and self-disclosure? In the movie the high/low game represent the high/lows of the day and what you can do to fix the low. Towards the end of the movie when the family is in the car, they ask: “what was your high /low today? “ Everyone stated their high and decided to leave the low parts out.
- How do Ben and Katie use equivocation and “benevolent lies” to protect their children form their marital problems? Ben and Katie use benevolent lies to avoid tension or conflict with their children so they wouldn’t know that they weren’t really together and how bad the relationship really was.
- How do Ben and Katie’s perception shift relate to Johari’s window? During Ben and Katie’s lunch with the Kirby’s, Ben and Katie seem to renew their love for one another putting their differences asides while playing hangman.
- What roles do confirming and disconfirming messages play in Ben and Katie’s conflict? he roles that confirming messages play in Ben and Katie relationship is that Ben doesn’t seem to acknowledge Katie any longer and the problems that they carry that is causing their relationship to fall apart.
- How do Gibbs categories reflect Ben and Katie’s communication? Seeing the Dr. helped them to evaluate their problems the help wit their marriage.
- What will they have to do differently in the future? One of Katie’s friends advised Katie that in the future in order for relationship to work, the couple needs to grow and understand one another.
- What conflict styles do Ben and Katie use most? Both Katie and Ben used a lot of avoidance with one another and a lot of compromise. They loved one another and they found ways to compromise and get along w/o arguing.
- Is their style complimentary, symmetrical or parallel? I think their style was parallel, because they often switched back and forth.
- Which intimacy/aggression style characterizes their conflict? The intimacy/aggression style that Ben and Katie used is the intimate-aggression style. Every fight they had they would often make up as well.
- What do you think Ben and Katie will have to do in the future to ensure positive conflict resolution? I think in any relationship communication is the primary key. If you can communicate with your partner, then you can also understand them and your relationship can work through anything.
Analysis of Development and the End of Relationships
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