What was I thinking? “Torpid conformity was a kind of sin; it was stupidity itself”. What does this short and possibly confusing phrase mean? If you think about it, it really isn’t all that confusing. The sentence all together simply means, “Going along with the crowd instead of doing what you want to do is just stupid. ” There have been many times that I have simply “gone along with the crowd” but I must inform you, that a lot of the things people consider going along with the crowd, I do because I want to do them, not because everyone else is doing them.
Anything from dying your hair, to cheating on a test, to buying new cellphones, or certain clothes could be considered conformity. Like I said, I have personally conformed in many ways. I cannot say that I am proud of it, but at the same time, I really don’t mind that I do. I have dyed my hair; I have fallen into that group of teenagers that cannot just keep their hair their natural color. I have dyed it multiple times, to attempt to morph the way I look, into an image I would like.
I mean, I dyed my hair to morph the way I look, to make me think I looked better, and hopefully to make other people think I look better too. This time, I just happened to fail when dying my hair. Another thing everyone considered conforming is wearing makeup, I literally cannot go into public without doing my makeup. The little make-up that I do wear is nothing too fancy. I mean, I don’t want to get noticed or stand out or attempt to make my face look better than anyone else’s. Really, my only goal when I wear make-up is just to make myself look presentable.
When I put on the make-up, I am not trying to be like everyone else, I am just trying to make myself feel better about the way I look. Because of how I was treated when I was younger, for the way I look, I changed the way I thought about myself and the way I felt I needed to look in order for that not to happen again. Probably the biggest thing in my life that I decided to conform to would be my career choice. I wouldn’t say the only reason I am going into the medical field, is because it is what my parents and family want, but it is probably the biggest reason.
I mean, my dream job isn’t to be a doctor working long hours and going to college for nine to twelve years, but it is good pay. And I am guaranteed to make money doing it. If I had to choose a job, I would be an actress. But like my parents have pointed out many times, there is no guaranteed making it in the acting world. Being a doctor is a reasonable career; people that are doctors usually get a lot of recognition and get praised for their career choice. Being an actor on the other hand, people don’t really praise you all that much for being an actor, unless you are super successful.
Even the smallest things like getting and upgrading electronics, can be considered conforming, or going along with the crowd. If we didn’t feel the need to be liked and accepted by everyone else, there would most likely be a lot more people still using dinosaur phones and not caring about the newest models. I have always been that person that upgrades electronics every time a newer phone has came out; I was the one begging my dad to get it for me. Usually, I actually got it.
Many of the times that I conformed, I wasn’t actually doing that just to seem cool or go along with the crowd. It was usually because I was doing it because that’s what I wanted to do, not because that’s what others wanted for me, or because I wanted to fit in. I mean, I do it unknowingly, but nonetheless I do it, we all do. I wear make up and dye my hair because of the way it made me feel when I looked good. I liked the whole not getting picked on thing, and wearing that makeup actually helped.
If I hadn’t been picked on when I was younger, I wouldn’t have formed those opinions of myself and I probably wouldn’t feel the need to wear make up all the time. My career choice, I am choosing to go to school to be a doctor because it is what my parents want, and it is just a logical thing to go to college for, knowing that for sure you are going to be making money doing that job. I know it would make my parents happy going to college for medical instead of acting or some other career where you are not guaranteed to make money.
As you can see, there are all these different and logical reasons as to why I choose to believe some of the things that I believe and do some of the things I do. I’m not always going with the crowd though; there are times where I do not conform. These days, that is a pretty big accomplishment. I can’t think of many things, because conformity is a wide range of things. But I can honestly say I’ve never cheated on any of my schoolwork before. I also have gone against the crowd and have never tried any illegal subsistence’s; I didn’t go along with the crowd and do things that can harm my body.
