In this existence full of vagueness and ever-fleeting prospects of change, there is only one constant that holds to be an unbending truth in all thinkable dimensions, feasible planes of reality, and possibly in every crack and crease across the universe. This perplexing difference is between a man and a woman, specifically in dating and relationships.
When it comes to keeping a relationship intact, both men and women value details, but in contrasting ways. Women tend to glorify and highlight even the smallest details in and out of the relationship, taking extensive notes especially when it comes to mistakes made by their partner. Women rarely forget anything as clinical psychologist Dr. Michael G. Conner explains that women have an enhanced ability to recall memories that have strong emotional components.” This includes fights, arguments, and even nonsensical discussions. Men also value details but may not focus on them as much as women do.
On the other hand, women tend to pay close attention to details and have a better memory recall than men. Men, on the other hand, have much more ease in effortlessly dismissing things, sometimes everything. They optimize the use of indispensable tools such as denial and disagreement when it comes to their slip-ups. According to Dr. Conner’s assessment, “Men tend to recall events using strategies that rely on reconstructing the experience in terms of elements, tasks or activities that took place.”
Men can easily attempt to combat women’s intuition and memory recall by playing dumb because sadly, that is sometimes actually the case. In a relationship between a man and woman fueled by admiration, respect, attraction and ultimately love; they realize that despite having “the” connection when it boils down to detail specification- women assure nothing is overlooked while everything is dissected.
The man has no choice but to face reality with no chance of getting away from it.
When it comes to problem-solving in a relationship, both men and women aim to identify a solution at the end of every challenging situation, but their methods differ. A man in a relationship under troubling circumstances with a woman would choose to directly address the root cause of the problem. As Dr. Conner identifies, Men have a tendency to dominate and assume authority in a problem-solving process.” On the other hand, women in relationships opt to alleviate stress, pain, and anxiety by discussing what went wrong in that certain situation repeatedly and in detail. Dr. Conner evidences this by saying, “Women are usually more concerned about how problems are solved than merely solving the problem itself.”
When it comes to planning for the future of their relationship, men and women consider long-term goals but differ in pacing when handling things. Men tend to take things rather elementarily – valuing today over tomorrow. According to Dr. Conner: “Men come to understand and consider problems one piece at a time.” By nature, men choose not to rush into final commitments; they take things slow instead. Conversely, women think ahead beyond just now or right now; they value both present moments as well as future possibilities equally important when making decisions about their relationships.
In conclusion, human beings are created as social beings and have a natural necessity for companionship and belongingness. Men and women generally share the same aspirations in this regard, but differences inevitably arise. However, despite these similarities and dissimilarities, when a man and woman are together in harmony, it is the most natural and beautiful thing imaginable.
Works Cited
Conner, Michael G. wrote an article titled Understanding the Difference Between Men and Women” in 2000.
Oregon Counseling, December 9th, 2008. Available at: http://www.oregoncounseling.org/ArticlesPapers/Documents/DifferencesMenWomen.htm.
