Children who portray this behavior tend to do this because they feel inferior and left out. They also could feel as if they are unable to control their behavior and emotion. So they feel out of control. They act out because they are trying to control things or the people in their lives. Children will try a number of ways to accomplish this and most often they are not good behaviors, because let’s face it parents or teachers give a bigger response to negative behavior. There are many ways to deal with this behavior. Parents can spend a little extra time with child doing something the child wants to do. Time needs to be given willingly, child will know if parents feel forced. Give the child an activity of their own in which they can excel. Never belittle their feelings. If the child is not open and expressive parents need to learn open ended questions that cannot simply be answered with a “yes” or “no” or “I don’t know”.
If the child tends to get violent hitting, kicking or otherwise hurting anyone in the family the child needs to understand that it is not allowed and if they do hurt someone they will not be allowed around that person. These children also need to be given affirmations; they can be physical such as a hug or pat on the head or verbal “I sure am glad you are here today”, affirmations can be a very powerful tool. They give the child unsolicited attention so there is no need for negative attention seeking. As parents and teachers we need to give children more positive attention.
