Self-concept is how a person has the knowledge of oneself. According to the Social Issues Reference(n. d. ), self concept is the accumulation of the knowledge about the self, such as beliefs regarding personality traits, physical characteristics, abilities, values, goals and roles. Self-concept is knowledge about how someone define themselves, either the similarity or the difference from others. It is a concept of how someone reflect themselves. Communication is one of the requirements in a life. Human are social creature, they are depend on each other helps.
Human communicate to fulfill their social needs. There are many kinds of how communication would like to be, it is mostly depends on the culture. Culture has variance that shaped the unique communication. Another factor is the living background which depicts the contrast difference between the social life level. In the movie of The Blind Side depicts how someone self-concept changed as the way of communicating changed goes. As a homeless kid and being move around through the foster houses, Michael Oher choose to be homeless rather than meet new family strange for him.
Being taken by the Family Services because of his drug-addicted mother makes him being a shy person. He become a quiet person with low self esteem, he had no courage to do anything. Except for his atletic talent. Everybody has the unpleasant impression about him because he shows the scary face with his huge size of body. Perception of others always selective and sometimes distorted. Michael perceive himself as a person with no value because he seems to be rarely communicate with people surround him. People scare like the girls in the park that runaway from the swinger after saw Michael.
Michael always assumed that nobody could make friends with him. Not until he meets SJ and SJ teach him to smile to everyone he mets. Impression management consists of strategic communication designed to influence other’s perception of an individual. Communicator creating a good impression by managing their manner and appearance in their engagement with people surrounding them. Grown up in the Hurt-Village when there are covered by the black people with bad manners that could be a threat. Being in a broken-home family, leads Michael to be a quiet guy and his attitude are not wild like the others.
Attached with the universal psychological influences, a cultural factor also affects perception. It comes when Michael Oher was admitted to the private Christian school because the first impression of the Coach Cotton who saw him playing basketball magnificently. He immediately encourages all of the board teacher to admit Michael Oher in the school. After take a look of his bad grades in previous school, all the teachers has bad first impression about Michael Oher band needs to consider about the admission in the school. Two or more people perceive the world in the different ways.
Talk about the teachers, their first impression is bad and tend to label Michael inaccurately because they have not seen him yet. First impression is not always accurate. When Michael walking on the way to school gym, Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy found him and bring him back home. Leigh Anne making him a great favour and taking care of him. Leigh Anne buy him clothes, feed him, and give his own room. Leigh Anne being so empathy of Michael. When another gives him a bad impression on first, Leigh Anne trying to put different point view of seeing Michael.
Perception checking is a good tool for increasing the empathy. She experiences the feeling of Michael emotionally. Her concern about Michael makes her care for others. By being empathic, it is enable someone to treat others more kindly, not to straightly go to conclusion based on first impression that always inaccurate. It is a precious tool to increasing understanding of others and leads to the effective communication. Showing the emphatics means that trying to understand people’s life better.
Berger (1987) stated that empathy is ‘The capacity to know emotionally what another is experiencing from within the frame of reference of that other person, the capacity to sample the feelings of another or to put one’s self in another’s shoes’. Based on the test that Michael been through, it found that he has great protective instinct stand out from all instinct that resulted unpleasant. That can shows when he always trying to Leigh Anne and the Tuohy’s, when he block the airbag from SJ at the time accident happen.
The protective instinct might shaped by his usual to protect his real mother that has a medical problem. As he took away from his mother, he being around moved from foster homes to another foster homes. He always had the instinct to protect his mother. Another factor considered might be because he is all around everywhere homelessly, he always trying to protect himself. This self concept shaped by life background of Michael. As Michael always trying to protect people around him, can be seen by what he always saying “I have your back” means that he always shelters people surrounds him.
By realized that Michael has a great instinct, Leigh Anne dig deeply about himself and helps Michael to improve his potential to play the sport that is relating to the self defense. In the football match, Michael starts to play well and know the rules, but one of the personnel of opposite team keep teasing him and makes him less self esteem. He losses focus to play and gain no score for the team. He’s back to think that nobody could give him a value because of the teases he got. Not until Coach Botton blame the umpire for not being justice not to give the yellow card to the other team personnel that kicked Michael’s head.
Coach Botton said that he willing to do everything to protect Michael because of his value for the team. From that on, Michael realized that he is worth for the team and get back his self-esteem. Michael feels his presence is worthwhile since Coach Botton defends him. His self-esteem makes him shows his potential and play great on the next game. Karl Perera (2007) stated that ‘low self esteem means poor confidence and that also that also causes negative thoughts which means that person are likely to give up easily rather than face challenge’.
Self-esteem is one of the key about how someone do something potential in life. Miss Sue always encourages Michael to do better in the school lesson even though sometimes Michael always giving up on the work, Miss Sue trying to support him that he actually could do better, it Is just the way how to reach there. Remember that Miss Sue is a Democrat, which is continuously treat others just the way she treats herself. As a democrat person, Miss Sue gives Michael an opportunity to reach his potential. Though in final, Miss Sue succeed to lead Michael to get a good grades.
Being questioning on the matter of which university he should go to, Michael finally decides to go to the Ole Miss University because he realized that is the university where all of Tuohy’s, his family wanted to. He finds his self-concept that he got a family that always comfort him and being a part of his life. The family that helps him shaped his self esteem through the potential he has and gives himself a worthwhile life. He become a newly born person that are welcoming, full of courage, and always smile so people have no worries anymore to be friended with him.
Although a person born with some personality characteristics, the self concept is shaped by how a person communicate by others. Once the self concept determined, it help us to be a key of how someone behave and how others respond us. The way someone communicate with other affects how does the person’s self-concept would shaped. It is no matter where does the person come from, their self-concept would not be always the same. It depends on the way they engaged with people surround them. The more good communication is, the greater self-concept that could be invented.
Social Issues References nd., Self Concept. Viewed 27 October 2010, http://social.jrank.org/pages/554/Self-Concept.html
Karl Perera, 2007, What is Self Esteem, viewed 27 October 2010, http://www.more-selfesteem.com/whatisselfesteem.htm
Berger, D. M.,1987, Clinical empathy, Northvale: Jason Aronson, Inc.