When life gives you lemons, Make a few Lemonades!!! “Every cloud has a silver lining,” These were the words I used to tell myself whenever I faced trouble all around me. Convincing myself soon the worst part will be over leading to a brighter future after being through many hurdles and speed bumps in my journey of life. Seems like I just convinced myself that things shall turn better in the near future, rather than actually to do something that shall bring me out of all my problems.
Had I even had half the willpower that I’m having today, I would have overcome a lot of hindrances then, but then there is a time for everything, even for my transformation which happened when there was still some time to rise above those hindrances. A transformation from a hysterical, stressful, insecure and mundane personality to someone who can face all her problems with a sheer willpower to overcome them. I should have to blame nobody but myself for all the sour lemons that I have faced in my life earlier or let me rephrase it ‘ for all the lemons that were thrown at me’ by none but myself.
Yes, I was my enemy. I pushed myself into a well but blamed all the others for it and instead of even trying to climb up, I was just feeling bad and sorry for myself for the crisis that I was facing which made it worse. When these problems occurred to me in a small scale, I who then had all the skills to be declared as an official mascot for Procrastination, didn’t even try to resolve it in the first place but rather didn’t even bother to prevent it thinking ‘let me think about it when I cross that bridge. ’ Well guess what?
The bridge collapsed when I set foot on it, just as I anticipated. Yes I did anticipate the outcome but I could not help myself not facing it because while the problem started to grow like a fungus infecting a severe burn wound, I was thinking that I’m going to fall and be doomed forever. Rather than trying to rectify the problem, I already made the terrible condition worse by having obsessive thoughts about the damnation that I was going to face due to it. I started to break down even before the problem started to take a toll.
These lemons which were thrown at me by myself started to revolve around me which made me to spiral back into the insecure neurotic freak I once was. I started to run away from my problems, Guess I couldn’t fool my lemons as they found me or I could say I visibly set a track for them to follow due to the actions of my anxiety. One wrong path has led to another and clearly from then on, all my actions had led me to choose the wrong path which again led me into a downward spiral.
When I thought there couldn’t be anything beneath the place where I was yearning for a redemption, I got some hope that I could be saved but only by me being my savior. So instead of waiting that somebody would come and throw me a rope so that I can climb and reach the surface, I started to look back at the track that I have come through. The track that I drew for myself because of my unstable mind. I realized what a mess I have created to myself. I knew I couldn’t erase that track that I created but rather could build a staircase myself to reach the top.
So from all the lemons that I have given myself I made lemonade which had rejuvenated me and gave me strength to overcome all these fear, insecurity, anxiety and stress and also to face new challenges that I’m facing these days without making the same mistakes that I had made earlier. I know these problems created be me were bad but at least I didn’t make my lemons to rot and make the things worse but made myself a refreshing glass of lemonade that revived me and had me to have a fresh start.
