INTRODUCTION
Once, a long time ago when the majority of men were still misogynists and women didn’t have the right to vote, sex was a serious discussion and a deed purely done by married men and women. Nowadays even seven year old kids know and do it. Premarital sex or a sexual relationship with the opposite sex without the holy sacrament of marriage as most of us know is a sin. Unfortunately our generation should’ve applied Beyonce’s song in our lives “if you like it then you should’ a put a ring on it”.
Studies indicate that more than three-quarters of young people have had sexual intercourse by the age of nineteen and continually rising by the year. The billion dollar questions here is why, Why didn’t people follow our ancestors and formed the dumb idea to have sex without being married first? What are the causes of premarital sex? Why do people engage in casual sex? What are the advantages and disadvantages of premarital sex? Are there positive effects from engaging in premarital sex?
CONTENT
Premarital sex is sexual activity practiced by persons who are unmarried. Historically it has been considered taboo in some cultures and religions. Until the 1950s the term “pre-marital sex” referred to sexual relations between two people prior to marrying each other. During that period, Western societies expected that men and women marry by the age of 21 or 22; as such, there were no considerations that one who had sex would not marry. The term was used instead of fornication, due to the negative connotations of the latter. The meaning has since shifted, referring to all sexual relations a person has prior to marriage; this removes emphasis on who the relations are with.
The definition has a degree of ambiguity. It is not clear whether sex between individuals legally forbidden from marrying, or the sexual relations of one uninterested in marrying, could be considered premarital. Alternative terms for pre-marital sex have been suggested, including non-marital sex, youthful sex, adolescent sex, and young-adult sex. These terms also suffer from a degree of ambiguity, as the definition of having sex differs from person to person. In the English-speaking part of Christendom, sex before marriage became taboo from the implementation of the Hardwicke Marriage Act in 1753.
This was in spite of there being “nothing said about premarital sex in the New Testament. The fact that this is not mentioned may seem strange in light of the fact that passages in the New Testament dealing with sexuality in general are quite extensive. Subjects include: the Apostolic Decree, sexual immorality, and divine love, mutual self-giving, bodily membership between Christ and between husband and wife and honor versus dishonor of adultery. Even with the large number of Bible passages that address issues of sexuality, interpretation of these verses can vary.
The issue of premarital sex is a good example of how the same verse can be viewed in different ways. In modern English, fornication typically refers to voluntary sexual intercourse between persons not married to each other. Given that modern definition, a verse that condemns fornication which is often cited by conservative denominations as biblical opposition to pre-marital sex would appear to be clear. However, in the New Testament, fornication is the word used to translate the Koine Greek word porneia into English.
In Ancient Greek, the word porneia meant “illicit sex” or “illegal sex”. Early Christians interpreted this word to encompass activities such as incest and bestiality. Modern-day conservative Christians tend to prefer the definition of premarital sex, or will even choose to broaden the term to also include activities such as masturbation and pornography, while liberal Christians tend to limit the interpretation of the word to illegal sexual activities such as incest, bestiality and pedophilia. After World War II, divergence in Christian teaching on sexuality accelerated.
Today, many mainstream and liberal Christians around the world affirm that the teachings against premarital sex arose erroneously due to a man-made law, the Hardwicke Act, or that they applied only in some cultural contexts. By contrast, many conservative churches, such as the Roman Catholic Church, Eastern Orthodox Church, Southern Baptist Church, the Mormon Church and many other independent churches hold onto the idea that premarital sex is sinful. Even some Conservative Greek Professors have conceded that fornication is quite a mistranslation.
When the assumption that pre-marital sex is taken away from the contexts of porneia, very little remains in the bible to suggest that it was thought in negative connotations, and therefore many believe that it is to be accepted morally. Nowhere in the bible does it explicitly condemn premarital sex, nor does it say that sexual relations are to take place only within marriage, therefore, going on to ban all sex outside of marriage is going somewhat past the scriptures, which Paul has lots to discuss about in Galatians.
On average, 61% of respondents across 24 countries agreed that premarital sex is not wrong at all. On the other hand, only 7% of respondents across the 24 countries agreed that there is nothing wrong at all with teenagers younger than 16 having sex. The countries most tolerant of both premarital and under 16 sex were East Germany, West Germany, Austria, Sweden and Slovenia. The most sexually conservative country on all four questions was the Philippines. Five other countries considered sexually conservative were the USA, Ireland, Northern Ireland and Poland.
According to a 2001 UNICEF survey, in 10 out of 12 developed nations with available data, more than two thirds of young people have had sexual intercourse while still in their teens. In Denmark, Finland, Germany, Iceland, Norway, the United Kingdom and the United States, the proportion is over 80%. In Australia, the United Kingdom and the United States, approximately 25% of 15 year olds and 50% of 17 year olds have had sex. Causes of Premarital Sex There is no behavior without reason. We need to examine reasons why Christian youths do fall into the sins of fornication.
One reason is pressure from parents, friends, peer group, lecturer, boss, future partners. Some men do mount pressure physically on their partners while some ladies mount pressure on their partners by dressing carelessly exposing their nakedness to seduce men. Some male bosses in places of work do mount pressure on their female workers, they want girls that can work for them and still satisfy them sexually. Curiosity, many youths have engaged themselves in premarital sex as a result of curiosity. They thought they were searching for reality, but they ended up destroying themselves.
They are not satisfied with what their parents, pastors and Christian friends told them concerning sex, they want to experience it themselves. Electronic media, Television, film, radio and video has contributed to the high rate of premarital sex. What youths watch on screen determine their behavior and character. Every product advertised on T. V. is just promoting sex. In fact, to advertise food items they use sex, film, television and radio promotes premarital sex. Most home videos are sex promoters.
Books and Magazines, Some satanic authors are in town destroying the youths, they write some sexual stories, books and magazines, they bring out many pictures that stimulate the youth to think about sex always. Having read all these books, youths do become restless until they have put into practice what they learned in the books and magazines. Environmental influence, we live in a corrupt society where people do not see anything bad in ungodliness they do not see premarital sex as sin; they see it as a normal thing. Hence, girls are encouraged to dress exposing their bodies.
Premarital sex has become the norm of the society. Some Christian youths find it difficult to cope in this kind of environment; hence, they fall into this ungodly act. Covetousness, Greed for money, wealth and position is another cause of premarital sex. Some ladies want money at all costs hence they are ready to use their bodies to get it by sleeping around with men. Indiscipline, Lack of discipline has led many singles into the dungeon of premarital sex. Wrong association, this has led many youth into destruction. Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.
Ignorance, Lack of good sex education has led many youth into premarital sex; some went into it not knowing what they were doing. Wrong information, since parents have refused to educate their children on the subject and the church is not forth coming with anything meaningful, the youth have resorted to any information they can get from anywhere either wrong or right. Bad parenting, Children that are not well brought up are likely to fall into wrong hands. Idleness, An idle hand is the devil’s workshop. If you are idle, you may cuddle the devil. Loneliness, some claim they went into fornication due to loneliness.
Broken homes, Children from broken homes can fall into wrong hands due to the situation of their homes. Seven reasons why people do premarital sex Sex is like pizza, even when it’s really bad, it’s still kind of good. Everyone’s Doing It, not that peer pressure is a good thing. It’s not. That headline is tongue-in-cheek. But really, almost everyone IS doing it. A recent study by New York’s’ Guttmacher Institute found that 9 of 10 Americans engage in premarital sex. To me, this shows that premarital sex is something that is outdated. See, in years past people married younger.
Perhaps just after high school, perhaps to his or her one and only sweetheart. This meant that years of fooling around were limited. Test Drive, you wouldn’t buy a car without test-driving it. You wouldn’t buy those pants without trying them on. Of course these examples can’t truly relate to a human being. However, chemistry is crucial to a marriage. Part of chemistry does happen in the bedroom. I firmly believe if people are not satisfied sexually, it can cause problems in the relationship. Knowing that you like sex with a person is a sure sign that the relationship will last.
Or, even just knowing that you or your partner enjoys sex in general is a good thing too. Think Married with Children, how Al Bundy always wanted Peggy, but she was never in the mood. I am not saying that sex is the most important thing in a relationship; however, if the sex is not that great (or nonexistent) it could eventually lead to someone’s needs getting satisfied elsewhere. Why do you think sex therapy exists, because it is that important to lasting relationships. “Where’d You Learn How to Do That? “, Hearing a partner say that will bring a smile to anyone’s face, and can even be a bit of an ego boost. “Damn, I’m good! )
Doing those little tricks or making someone feel good is something that comes with experience. Having multiple partners prior to being committed can be a great sexual exploration and learning experience. America didn’t become the country it today without a little exploring! People are born with talent yes, but skills need to be honed. It Hurts the First Time, If my very special wedding night included a very physically painful experience, it would certainly be a night to remember. But, not for the right reason. Plain and simple, in most cases when a woman loses her virginity it is painful.
There could even be blood involved. Lots of foreplay and a lubricant can relax a nervous female virgin and make intercourse easier and less painful, but wouldn’t it just be easier to have had some practice? On the male side, knowing where ‘it’ goes is important. Sure, we all know where it goes, but men could be clumsy. Ever hear a man say, “Is it in? ” They ask that because they may not know what it feels like. Does any sexual experience need a little coaching? Sure. But being able to impress your partner on the wedding night, or perhaps lasting a while can result from experience in the bedroom.
Where Does the Gay Population Fit In? Huh? Anyone Think About That? If gay marriage is something that states collectively aren’t going to agree on, then where do those in the GLBT realm fit into all this? Are GLBTs exempt from premarital sex because they cannot get married? Or, does this mean that they can’t ever have sex? That one baffles me! Also, what if a teen is uncertain of his or her sexuality. What if they want to experience sex with someone of the same sex to be sure if those feelings are real? What happens then?
Is this why some marriages end in divorce because one partner reveals e or she is gay? Did the pressure of premarital sex preaching get to them so much that they never fully understood their own sexuality? What About Anullments? So, if one marries, gets divorced and falls in love again-and then gets engaged what happens? They are in a premarital situation again. And oops. They already had sex. You Never, It seems that every conservative article about morals and values are just that- preachy and conservative. Yet, when people get clever and original and even funny in a liberal article, they get bashed. Some people take life too seriously
The Disadvantages of premarital sex Physically, premarital sex poses the same risks as post-marital sex. It can be a disease vector, transmitting Chlamydia, gonorrhea, genital herpes, HIV and other such diseases. There is also a risk of an unplanned pregnancy in heterosexual relationships. Emotionally, it can lead you to depression. It also gives you feelings of guilt and a sense of loss for something very valuable. The Advantages of Premarital Sex Premarital sex experience benefits us both physically and psychologically–conducive to health, because of the urgent need, not towed until adulthood.
According to psychological studies, it shows that when the organs of our body become mature because of hormone secretion. Psychologically, people will, accordingly with the changes, have sexual desire, which is normal. If the desire cannot be satisfied, it will affect people’s work, learning, and life. However, it varies according to the different people – some are very strong, and some are very weak. When people are with a strong desire, the so-called “sexual energy”, they can temporarily alleviate the sexual energy produced by having sex, which can give them a happy feeling, and a sense of achievement.
The Side Effects of Premarital Sex Experience Many modern young women do not mind the long-term relationship. They think that as long as men love them, they do not care about if it is a long relationship. In fact, these women can only see the surface. They do not know what would happen later actually. Premarital sex in general have occurred in the students and those without a stable source of community among the youths. They have sex because sex is something curious for them, and they will not be responsible, or in any obligations.
When the sexual desire is gone, and something unexpected happens, some of them have the psychological fear, inferiority. Because premarital sex occurred in the majority of those who lack the knowledge of sex and experience, they may be pregnant after having sex, which may do great harm to these women physically and psychologically. Some of the disease once infected, there is no way to treat the disease, such as AIDS. According to analysis and what we discussed above, I think premarital sexual experience has pros and cons, and by and large, the benefit of premarital sex is far less than the disadvantages. How to solve the problem of premarital sex behavior still remains an arduous task and a problem for us to tackle.
THE STAND OF THE GROUP
In the past, dating, courtship, and engagement were distinct stages in the selection of a marital partner. Each stage represented an increasing level of commitment and intimacy. Although this remains true to some degree, studies show that since the nineteen-sixties these stages have tended to blend into one another. Nowadays, modern dating and courtship often involve sexual relations.
The odern mate-selection process frequently includes the practice of cohabitation or on layman’s terms living together in an unmarried sexual relationship. Cohabitation has a long history among poor people, but has become popular among young, middle-class adults. Cohabitation often precedes marriage, but in some cases, people continue to cohabit without marrying. Modernization has made people view premarital sex as a trivial and flippant matter regardless of race, age, and gender. Most of teenagers regard Premarital Sex as a nonchalant coffee table topic and deed.
Most of teenagers nowadays were exposed to the topic of sex at a very young age which in turn made them curious and finally made them want to try it themselves. Due to modernization with its technological advancements we easily get hold of pornographic materials, rated TV programs and movies. Another factor is the lack of guidance, just like the reported seven year old boy who had sex with his female playmate in a public market in the wee hours of midnight. It was later found out that his parent was for the lack of a better term a prostitute and that he was exposed to premarital sex at a very early age and was curious to try it.
As teenagers we are prone to committing a ton of mistakes and that’s normal but we need the guidance of our parents to teach us which mistakes not to make. There are mistakes that mold a person to be stronger and there are mistakes that destroy a person’s emotional state and make their life harder. It’s up to our peers to teach us from a very early age which mistakes we should never make. Another factor is conformity, as adolescents we are all striving for the feeling of fitting in with our peers. Conformity is doing and thinking as others in order to fit in.
We also call this as peer pressure; this is a cliche as movies call it. There are some peers that encourage each other to have sex for them to fit in. Nowadays though you seldom see this most of teens today have sex due to the fact that they actually like it. To most teens today however premarital sex is a form of blowing of steam and having fun. How to prevent premarital sex Premarital sex is not approved by any modern society, yet, stories of adolescent fathers and mothers come out largely, especially from the highly civilized European nations.
Modern lifestyle has opened multiple opportunities for boys and girls to interact closely and deeply in public and private. They have ample chances to experiment the sexuality which they witness through internet and Televisions. Law can only threaten people; can never make them to not do something. The most effective way of defending premarital lovemaking is spreading awareness of healthy sexuality among children. Awareness of healthy sexuality is not at all the knowledge of safe sexuality. Train them to mingle with opposite sex in a mature way.
Inspire them with mutual respect between man and woman. From the very childhood itself a baby should learn to accept people as men and women, the equal partners of life on earth; not as objects to fulfill lusty wishes and ambitions.
CONCLUSION
The sole purpose of this study was to find out why people engage in premarital sex while others do not. Well my group mates and I have discussed and re-discussed the topic of premarital sex to the point of exhaustion and we all agree on one thing, everything started with modernization.
We have nothing against modernization because lets face it, it made our lives a lot easier but just like every product it has side effects Premarital sex is just one of it’s side effects. It all started with modernization but it all ends with us, human beings. Due to modernization premarital sex has become normal to most of adolescents nowadays, but it’s us who decide what happens with our lives. Most of adolescents today have sex because of early knowledge of it and they keep having sex because they like it. In the eyes of teens today premarital sex has become a norm in our society.
Yes, premarital sex is a sin we all know that it’s up to us if we choose to do it or if we choose not to. No matter how much adults caution us kids about premarital sex, it will still depend on how we perceive it to be for us to either say yes or no to it. Each and every one of us are different as people, and each and every one has different point of views and understandings of this broad issue but our group learned that the possibility of premarital sex is lurking at every corner it’s up to us if we yield to the temptation or fight and avoid temptation.
REFERENCE
- Dr. John Dean and Dr. David Delvin. “Anal sex”. Netdoctor. co. uk. Retrieved April 29, 2010.
- J. Joseph Speidel, Cynthia C. Harper, and Wayne C. Shields (September 2008). “The Potential of Long-acting Reversible Contraception to Decrease Unintended Pregnancy”. New York: Marshall Cavendish. 2010. pp. 663–666.
