In today’s society and culture we are surrounded by people telling us that we can find happiness by having sex at any time we feel like it. This message is displayed in the media through television, internet, music, movies, video games, and more. People will try to convince you and say “Just try it and you’ll be happy,” or “a life with no sex is boring. ” Through my studies in the Scriptures I feel led to tell you that the Bible says something quite different than what the world is telling us to do.
The culture we live in and what the media tells us to do is no excuse to break the standards that God has set out for us in His Word. I will now go into the lies of premarital sex, what the Bible says about premarital sex, and why we are called to wait until marriage to have sex. I will now go into the details of the lies culture tells us about sex. The following points I’m about to make come from LeaderU. com. The first lie is that sex creates intimacy. This is a lie because intimacy comes from verbal communication and emotional contact.
Intimacy is built upon three values: honesty, love, and respect. In fact premarital sex could get in the way of intimacy. According to Donald Joy, having premarital sex can cut off the emotional connection development. He also mentions a study of 100,000 women that have had sex before marriage presents these three problems: unhappiness in their marriage, discontentment with the amount of intimacy, and profound confidence. The second lie I want to address, also from LeaderU. com, is that starting sex early in a relationship will help you get to know one another and become better partners later.
This is a misunderstanding of what sex really is. According to LeaderU. com, “In healthy marriages, sex takes its natural place beside the intellectual, emotional and practical aspects of life. (Fryling, 1)” Married couples spend the majority of their time in discussion, working out issues, and in emotional contact. The third lie according to LeaderU. com is that sex is freedom. Also according to this website “Young people who become sexually active in response to peer pressure to be sophisticated and independent are actually becoming victims of current public opinion. Fryling, 1)” You are not really ‘free’ if you’re doing what the world is telling you to do. So saying that sex is freedom is outright not true. The fourth and final lie I want to address, also coming from LeaderU. com is that surely God understands that this is the 21st century! How can what society says is ok be wrong? This claim will now lead us into what the Bible says about premarital sex. The Bible is very clear that sex outside of marriage is wrong.
Exodus 20:14 is a direct commandment from God saying “Do not commit adultery. Jesus addresses the heart in Mark 7:21, “For from within, out of men’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery,… ” Paul says in 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. Perhaps Hebrews 13:4 sums it up: “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. ” This brings me to tell you that when we live within the standards that God has set out for us, we live by faith in God. Hebrews 11:1 says “Now faith is being sure of what he hope for and certain of what we do not see. ” We must apply this definition of faith to our lives to everything we do. We can also learn from other previous experiences people have had and how they wish they would have never gone as far as they did.
It only causes more pain and grief if you violate the rules God has for us. The road will not be easy either, as it will take strength and courage to win the battle and to stay sexually pure until marriage. In conclusion, I urge you to not have sex before you are married. Do not buy the lies this culture has said to be right. Instead, listen to what the Bible says about the immorality of premarital sex. Finally, I urge you to live out the commands God has set out for us. To summarize what I’ve said, the world will come at you with lies that will tempt you to believe that sex outside of marriage is right.
Instead we should look at what Jesus said and other Scripture verses to see that the world’s view of sex is incorrect. Finally, we are called as Christians to live out the principles God has laid out before us and to abstain from sex until marriage. I urge you that you will have no regrets playing the waiting game until you are married. If you abstain from sex you will not carry any previous shame or guilt from any previous relationship into your marriage. Your heavenly father will reward those who remain faithful to Him and his standards.