Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need To Succeed In Life

Table of Content

The aim of the book is to show leaders a way of doing their work by use of mentoring technique as a leadership device. Mentoring is further divided into seven sections which are spiritual guide, counselor, sponsor, coach, discipler, and teacher and lastly model which are further divided into historical and contemporary models. Mentoring as a tool is defined by the authors in relationship terms as understanding where an individual uses divinely given resources to empower another person. Four objectives are plainly stated by the writers as follows;

a)      How one can be mentored by the few mentors around.

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b)      Reasons why mentoring works.

c)      A representation of mentoring relationships.

d)     They clearly show how mentoring can help someone. [1]

The seven mentoring functions are combined to make two functions namely intensive and passive mentoring. .Responsiveness, Attraction and Accountability are the three important dynamics of the process of mentoring. [2]

Relational experience mentoring is emphasized as both greatest weakness and the greatest strength of the book. Relational experience as a weakness in this book is brought about by the contradiction between how a person should relate to the other people around him and at the same time knows God. According to book mentoring is all about how one can get to knowing God while on the other hand have access to the wisdom, direction, vision and experience of the people who went before There is a strong emphasis on the other hand of skills and values which a mentor offers yet there is no consideration of how one can find God through mentoring. It is also noted that, in cases where a known disciple maker might need help, God will always provide a mentor so it is good to know God.

Relational experience is also the greatest strength of the book. On this note, not all people are believers so relational experience non believers an alternative to have access to mentoring without the need of knowing God. In addition, the writers don’t show the kind of mentoring that shows how one can meet the Holy and the almighty grace as a Christian leader needs to survive and succeed. According to the book, any one who needs mentoring can be mentored by teachers, sponsors or coaches who should not necessarily know God to mentor people. In other words, it is not a necessity to know God to get mentored and in fact not all mentors should know God.

The significance of the concepts in the book is that one get mentoring from a wide range of sources, since the authors have given quite a good number of people who can offer mentoring services. In an overall view, the authors show that mentoring is very important in developing leadership skills. It also emphasized that counselors and teachers can be very good when it comes to mentoring.   This typical debate of mentoring brings out two key authorities on developing leadership. Their argument widens the field after taking mentoring to include range of diversified relationships. Ideally an undertaking that has an individual benefiting from another is known as mentoring. Role models are also taken into account as passive mentors. Secular mentors are those people who can help someone in professions or business. An important point to note is that majority of Christian leaders’ oftenly refer to one or more who have had influenced their lives significantly. The three most intentional mentors are the coach, discipler and the spiritual guide. We must be aware of multiple scenarios whereby discipler have been of great influence to the lives of the same believers. People ought to invest meaningfully in any disciple’s life in the name of good community. The problem is that people expect someone to the lead help a believer who is in need instead of taking the responsibility. . The authors expose alarming conclusion that nearly all leaders fail to.

The foundation of the book is on simple finding. According to a research done on mid career leaders concluded that very few leaders end up well. Further a leaders association to another person improved his chances of ending well. Since Clinton Stanley are big names in maters of leadership development this book stands for a popular and lightweight model of much larger tomes. The main focus of the authors is to show how one might get access to a mentor who may enrich one’s life, and how. The book is based on nine types of mentors and ten rules necessary for a successful one-on one mentoring. The authors further give special attention to two more types of mentoring which are; the constellation model which is a network of upward, downward, and lateral mentoring and peer-co mentoring that is mentoring with a friend.

There is a strong basis of experience and research, so this gives one a reason to read the book. It is a simple and easy to read book. It also has excellent use of tables, diagrams and illustrations in real life to give it a readable and approachable way. All in all it provides one with a first class understanding of the more real life features of mentoring and being mentored, and make one have the urge of going into the serious and advanced undertakings of Clinton and Stanley.


Mentoring Relationships, retrieved on 26th, October, 2008, available at

Paul D. Stanley, J. Robert Clinton (1992) Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need to Succeed in Life, NY, NavPress Publishers

So What Is Mentoring, retrieved on 26th, October, 2008, available at om/Connecting-Mentoring-Relationships-Need-Succeed/dp/0891096388

[1] (Paul, Stanley, Clinton, (1992) Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need to Succeed in Life pg 13)
[2] (Paul, Stanley, Clinton, (1992) Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need to Succeed in Life pg 41-45

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Connecting: The Mentoring Relationships You Need To Succeed In Life. (2016, Jun 13). Retrieved from

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