Comparative Critique First Draft
The roles each spouse play within their family and what the other partner is lacking are discussed in these articles. Edelman and Bartels express their displeasure concerning their partners and the chores they perform domestically. Wives have an image of what they want their home life to be like, but according to traditional American families, the gender roles of “nurturer’ and “provider” are fixed within everyone minds. Even with limitless efforts by American females to be freed from their male counterparts and the apparent natural domestic image, in some cases, such as Edelman and Bartels, it is unavoidable that they end up with gender roles such as those of the 1950’s housewife ideal. In this ideal; wives handle domestic life and husbands retain financial support. Though these essays address marriage from both a male and female perspective, they both discuss idealistic views of marriage, lack of communication, blame, and how to fix their problem.
In her article “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was.” Hope Edelman writes about how many women (including herself) feel enlightened and encouraged to be independent from their husbands, yet frequently, these women still end up doing most of the domestic work and end up as stay at home moms. Most times these woman end up resenting their children. Edelman explains the challenges that married couples encounter when trying to balance responsibilities at work and home. Edelman uses her own marriage as her example in her article; her husband works ninety-two hours a week and she is forced to put aside her dreams for now so that she can take care of their children at home.
(????Neither Edelman’s nor Bartels’ marriages end up the way they have imagined. Edelman’s husband promises her in their wedding vows to be her “partner at home and in life,” but they “stopped feeling like a team” (190). He breaks his promises to her.????)
In Eric Bartels’ article “My Problem With Her Anger”, he discusses his frustration with his wife because she is angry with him all the time. Bartels imagined his marriage differently; he imagined being able to communicate with his wife and being able to communicate the way things should be done. He thought he would get credit for all that he does around the house. Bartels describes how he feels as if he is the dominant parent and his wife just has so much built-up anger that she constantly takes out on him. After working many hours, and helping to take care of the kids, he is yelled at by his strained wife about what he has done wrong and what he could have done right. Bartels offers reasons as to why his wife is so angry (motherhood and professional success) while also acknowledging that he has made mistakes in the marriage. In his article, Bartels does a poor job at showing her side of the story and admitting to lashing out on her every now and then.