Sometimes people have no control over whom they begin a love relationship with. One does not see color, religion, culture, country, etc. difference, so it is very possible that someone may fall in love with a foreigner who has a totally different culture, which may result in a cross-cultural marriage. No matter how deeply this couple is in love with each other, differences will rise due to the variations in culture. Marrying someone with totally different culture will lead to leaving one’s country, inability of grandparents to communicate with grandchildren and leaving one’s traditions.
Marrying someone with totally different culture forces one the spouses to live outside his/her country. By that he/she will live instead in his/her partner’s country. Living in an outside country maybe interesting in the beginning but gradually this excitement will be substituted by homesickness. Though the feeling of homesickness differs from one person to another but it will always be there, Vince Appleby said, “Of course this homesickness factor is reduced in some people and magnified in other, depending on their personal history and what their home means to them”.
It is so hard that one does not visit his home, family or friends for so long stretches on time. When someone leaves his country, this means he is leaving his position in the society as well. He/she must consider that the socioeconomic class he/she held in his own culture, may not cross over in the other spouse’s culture. Since one of the spouses will have to live outside his/her country that means that his/her parents will see his/her children very little. Children will not really get know their grandparents.
Sometimes grandparents will be able to communicate with their grandchildren due to the difference in language they use, as grandchildren will get used to the language of the other country which can be totally different than their grandparents’. Carol O’Hara mentioned “Not only will your children not have the opportunity to know one set of their grand parents very well, if there is a language barrier, one set of parents will not be able to really communicate well with your children. ” As a result, grandparents will not be able to pass their experiences to their grandchildren or give them advices as grandparents always do.
By marring someone from another culture one of the spouses will get go his/her traditions. He/she will not be experiencing his/her cultural traditions and national celebrations and instead he/she will adapt to his/her spouse’s ones which he/she never knew. One of the spouses must be willing not to pass his/her children the cultural traditions and national heritage he/she had. Experiencing new traditions will be a lot of fun in the beginning but when he/she start feeling that it is because they are far away from their country, he/she will feel like they are loosing his/her identity.
There may be a conflict between spouses about who pass his own culture to the children and who will not. Christine Benlafquih said, “Even couples from the same culture clash on issues such as discipline techniques. But there are extra parenting dilemmas in intercultural marriages and debating whether or not to raise bilingual children is only one concern”. On the other hand, others have different opinions concerning cross-cultural marriage and think that it’s advantages overweighs its disadvantages. Cross-cultural marriage will develop a deeper understanding of people and things beyond our borders.
The article “Marrying into a different nationality” stated, “We learn to tolerate the strength and the familiar, experiment with behavior that we never thought we were capable of. ” This is somehow true but learning about people and things can be done by researches or by visiting foreign countries not by leaving the home country completely, because by that people may lose their identity as they will never feel that the other country is their home no matter how long he/she stays in it and will always feel like a stranger.
It is also thought that cross-cultural marriage will acquire the spouses the gift of laughter as they will laugh at each other and their children and use the laughter to diminish the ignorance of other cultures. But people from different cultures may not laugh on the same thing and spouses may find difficulties in understanding the other’s humor as Carol O’Hara said, “Things that are funny to one will not be funny to the other. You will have to explain the humor to one another. ”
To sum up, some people may find marrying someone with another culture is exciting. The idea comes to them due to experiencing some new and different things. What people sometimes do not consider is that these new and different things may turn into the reason of conflict and misunderstanding between spouses. As an advice, no one should rush into a cross-cultural marriage unless he/she is ready to let go his/her traditions, willing for his children to not really know his/her parents and be ready to live outside his/her country.
One should think of all that and even more before thinking of marrying someone from another culture. Works Cited Appleby, Vince. “Marrying someone from another country. ” International Pen Pal. 2009. 10 May 2009. Benlafquih, Christine. “Tips for Successful Intercultural Relationships. ” Suite101. 27 Mar 2008. 10 May 2009. “Marrying into a Different Nationality. ” Professor’s House. 10 May 2009. O’Hara, Carol. “Are you thinking of marrying someone from another culture. ” Positively Feminine. 10 May 2009.
Cite this Cross-Cultural Marriage
Cross-Cultural Marriage. (2017, Mar 18). Retrieved from https://graduateway.com/cross-cultural-marriage/