The movie, The Notebook, is a love story that is un-compared to others. It tells the story of an older man and his wife who is dying of Alzheimer’s. The movie is about Noah (the older man) telling Allie (the older woman) a story that is about the two of them as they met, fell in love and eventually had a wonderful romantic life together. The story was written by Allie when she found out that she was ill and she did not want to lose her loving relationship with her husband and she did not want to not be able to remember him or her family. The movie shows her momentarily recovering and recognizing him and then falling back into her state of Alzheimer’s. The movie is a beautiful portrayal of a love story that involves many different ideas and practices.
One theory for love is the Attraction Theory. This theory is about the idea that if someone is finding someone else attractive that is similar to oneself both physically and in personality. What this means is that someone who finds someone else attractive both physically and through their personality is someone who is most interested in them and wants to have a relationship with them.
In the movie, The Notebook, Allie and Noah fell in love when they found each other to be attractive. Both characters state on numerous occasions that they thought that the other was the most attractive person physically. Also both characters have a personality connection and they seem to do well together in their personalities. They laugh a lot when they are talking and interact with each other well. This proves that the characters in the movie were attracted through the Attraction Theory.
There can also be many outside causes for deterioration in a relationship. One cause for problems in many relationships is the outside influence of one’s family or friends. Another can be new relationships between one of the former partners in a relationship.
In this movie there was the problem with Allie’s family not feeling that Noah was from a good enough family. The family’s influence forced a wedge between the couple that caused them to break up and spend some time apart and Allie even got engaged to a known socialite of the time.
The communication in relationship deterioration is another problem in that there are a lot of communication breakdowns when a relationship is deteriorating. These things are that there is a stronger chance of deception, a withdraw from the relationship, and a decrease in self disclosure.
In the movie all of these were present when the relationship was deteriorating. Noah was not honest about what he was feeling and started keeping to himself more as he did not believe that he was good enough for Allie. Also Allie started talking to other people and was not completely honest about what her family was saying about Noah.
There are many different sides to ending a relationship. When a relationship is deteriorating the parties may become disengaged with each other and withdraw from activities that they once enjoyed together. Another issue with a relationship ending is that each party will deal with the break up differently. Some will choose to devote themselves to work while others will work to move on and not think about the other.
In the movie, the two characters break up when Noah heads off to war. Noah writes to Allie on a regular basis however her mother steals the letters and does not give them to her as she wants her daughter to marry someone with influence and money. So Allie moves on by meeting and becoming engaged to someone else while Noah tries to move on by buying an old house that Allie loved and fixing it up for her. Noah always holds on to the hope that he and Allie will be together again one day.
A relationship can easily be repaired through general relationship strategies. These include the idea that one would need to fix the problems that have caused the break up. Another is that the individuals need to recognize the problems, work on productive conflict resolution, try to find solutions to their problems, affirm what the other is feeling, taking the risk of being together again and integrating the other’s beliefs into their own.
Each of these areas is represented in the movie when the couple is finally able to reconcile and be together again. Allie sees that Noah has the house that he had told her that he would fix up for her and sees that it has been fixed up and that he is now selling it in the paper. Allie goes to see Noah. While she is there she confronts him for not writing to her and he answers her that he wrote every day and that he did not understand why she had not wrote back to him. He then talks about how there were all of the problems with her family and that he believes that they will not be able to be together. She goes on to tell him about the deep love that she has for him and how that will not change and in the end they end up together after discussing how they know the other one felt and working through their issues.
The Social Exchange Theory states that one is more apt to be in a relationship where they will profit or where they will see gains. This is the idea that someone needs to benefit from a relationship in some way or the couple would not be together.
Throughout the movie this idea is reflected. Many think in the movie that the reason that Noah is interested in Allie is because she comes from a very wealthy family and that he is after her wealth. However when they are apart and Allie is with her first fiancé, a man who is very wealthy it is apparent that this is the reason that she is with him. She is with this man because of his ability to care for her and take care of her rather than because she loves. With Noah this is never the real motivation to his relationship and he truly loves Allie with all of his heart.
In the Stages of Deterioration the person who is experiencing the deterioration will go through many phases. They will lose track of who they are, who others are and the importance of those individuals in their lives.
This is one of the main themes to the movie as Allie has Alzheimer’s and is deteriorating. She loses sight of who she once was, who she is and who Noah is. When she finds out that she has Alzheimer’s she writes their love story in a notebook and then she sits and asks Noah to read her this notebook in order to help her to be able to come back to him. In the movie this works on occasion where she is able to come back to him and know who he is for a few moments. However this is followed by some of the worst parts of the deterioration of this disease in that she breaks down and freaks out and does not know who Noah is during other moments.
There are many Reasons for Maintaining a Relationship. Some of these reasons include the emotional attachment that two people share. Some other reasons are that there are children, a fear of being without the other person, convenience of knowing that you always have someone who is there for you, and a strong sense of commitment. The maintenance stage of a relationship can be characterized by a number of qualities that each person might possess. These qualities include being nice to one another, being open in communications, assuring one another, being positive, working on improving one’s self and the strong desire to keep the relationship together.
Some of these characteristics are true in the movie. In the movie the relationship is maintained even after a long battle with a debilitating disease. Noah and Allie’s children even encourage Noah to leave his wife in the nursing home and to move in with them so that he would be better able to have a better life. However in the movie, Noah is staying with Allie because he is truly and deeply madly in love with her. He believes that she is one person whom can complete his life and maintain his happiness. He continues to have a strong sense of commitment.
